Coming into my own

Let her cry for she’s a lady

Let her dream for she’s a child

Let the rain fall down upon her

She’s a free and gentle flower growing wild – Sandy Lam

During my teenager years growing up in Hong Kong, Sandy Lam was my favorite pop singer. Her beautiful voice and her interpretation of music touched me deeply. I find some of my favorite songs of hers are as impactful today as the first time I listened to them. Sandy’s popularity has grown steadily over the years. As I recall, her success didn’t happen overnight. When Sandy first appeared on the pop music scene in Hong Kong back in the early 80s, she was working as a DJ at a local radio station. Much like most of the pop singers back then, she did a lot of cover versions of Japanese pop songs. Most of her early music was considered bubble gum music. She did not have the strong vocal skills as she has nowadays, and she had yet developed a vocal style that made her music stand out. As time goes on, she puts a lot of effort into improving her vocal skills and learns to infuse her songs with emotions by making her own interpretations. Gradually she develops her own style, and her popularity continues to grow. She doesn’t rest on her laurel as she gains her success, she continues to refine her vocal style and has experimented with different musical genres. The moment I realized Sandy hit her stride and found her own niche was with the release of the album “Wildflowers”. It was widely considered as one of the top conceptual albums ever released by a female pop singer in Hong Kong. Her confidence was evident throughout the album. It was a timeless creation.

This past week I went photographing at my favorite spot the Osamequin trail again. I had not been there for a long while. It was delightful to see the tall golden grass were in full display, and to my great surprise, plenty of weed and undergrowth thrived despite the recent extreme cold weather. I took advantage of the glorious display and went to work. The ideal soft sunlight casting on the weed made for ideal condition for photography. I was feeling giddy with the plentiful of beautiful material I got to work with.

When I reviewed the images a couple of days later, I was happy with the results, but most importantly, this time around, I had a strong feeling I was coming into my own when it came to my photography. I feel by sticking to my conviction of photographing subjects that speak to me for the past two years, I finally hit my stride and find my own voice. My subjects may not always be the usual photogenic material that hold wide appeal, I am proud I strive to produce honest work. My continual pursuit of my own vision has strengthened my confidence about my capability. It is a gratifying feeling when you have faith in what lies within you. As I worked on editing those weed images, trying to form a collection, I recalled the same feeling I felt as I listened to Sandy’s “wildflower” album – work that shows someone who has faith in herself for creating art that is deeply personal. The art that I am proud of calling it my own.

Then the question comes as to how to build that confidence. My experience tells me the only way is by doing. Real confidence only comes when we continue to practice our craft, make more art, make it an integral part of your life instead of putting it on the backburner, dusting it out when you feel like it. Instead of mulling over ideas, figuring out how to make the most perfect photos, waiting for the perfect weather conditions, just get yourself out the door and get moving. Stop listening to that critical voice of yours, stop making excuses and expectations, tell yourself to enjoy the moment while you are creating. We don’t know how our work may end up, it may end up nowhere, who knows. You will never know where you end up if you don’t at least make a start.

When you start the habit of creating consistently, your skills will continue to improve. As your skills improve, you will gain more trust and confidence in yourself and your creations. As we see ourselves making good progress, it motivates us to play more, create more and experiment more. Ultimately it creates a positive feedback loop, and it creates a continuous growth cycle. Every time you create something, you keep the fire burning.

When I create work that the ideas and vision come from within, I have the utmost satisfaction. They may not be liked by others, or they may not win any awards. To me, creating honest work is the way to cultivate my confidence and continue to grow as an artist.